Feeltoflyy3's Blog

in no specific order. and yet needing to be said. the first in a series that’s still needs edits or reconsiderations. ((which can never stop… because, then it means it’s over)) and while we live vicariously through insufficient words, at the end of the day… it’s all we have to help paint the unpaintable picture.

slide on shoes and digitcal camera memories.

my hearts in israel. pray to the letters for direction.

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Beaches in Televiv and sweet kisses in the dead sea.

Conversations hugged by the hot tears burning behind my eyes while we stare up at the stars and know the inevitable is coming.  The countdown begins, and the anticipation is heavy upon my chest. I feel like I could spontaneously combust at any moment, and I pull his hand closer to mine. Save me from my life of a million regrets. Please take me with you; let’s stay, or run, or just sit here quietly and pray to the Western Wall that it never disappears. The ambitious bells loud songs ricochet across the quarters of the old city of Jerusalem, the chimes so vibrant and strong to the point where they could be considered distracting.

And then the chills roll down my spine now as I look back in quiet retrospect – I don’t remember noticing that they ever stopped.

And I’m back to feeling like more of a stranger here than I did when I first began my journey in Israel. Before I met some of the best friends I have ever know. Before I fell in love.

And to think I’ve come this far without knowing who I’ve become       .

(these words don’t exist to me)